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Showing posts from April, 2011

Chronic fatigue, mental proliferation and the cycle of doom

I had an outage recently and managed not to get too sucked in to the mire. Here's a picture that explains it (it gets bigger if you click on it):


Briefly:

wake up -> feel bad -> think down thoughts -> more bad feelings -> down thoughts invites friends; more difficult thoughts -> then you're stuck in the s**t.

So then, it's best to try to not engage with this process, although almost impossible because the physical evidence is telling you something else and the mental associations happen very quickly.

Where is the way out? Friendly thoughts have friends too.

The mind is like a small dog

To effect any change it needs regular training. When it strays, bring it back. Eventually, over time, it will learn. We want things to be quick and easy, but these things take a while to sink in.

Chronic fatigue - efforting versus allowing

Some days just never get going - it's just a brain with sludge in it. When this happens (as it has been doing recently) then it's time to take another approach. There's a difference between trying to get going (efforting) and giving yourself the room to get going (allowing). Efforting is contracted, forcing, a pressure to reach a certain level of functioning. Allowing is finding somewhere pleasant and letting things rise in a more natural fashion - we drift on the currents of our wellness. We stay open, we stay relaxed, until we have reached an accommodation with our day ahead.

Thoughts are just thoughts but they do have effects

It's comforting to know that thoughts are just thoughts and we can leave them at that, but they are still quite difficult. Particular thoughts have quite substantial impacts on our feelings and emotions. If I said I saw your partner kissing someone else in the window of cafe, then, if you believed me, you might experience a series of difficulties. If you have an underlying illness then these difficulties can lead to all sorts of problems that leave you feeling quite helpless.

So then, thoughts are just thoughts but that's just one part of the process. They still have the power to hurt like hell.

Live in the moment

The past is full of regret, the future is full of forboding, so sometimes it's best to hang out in the present moment. Give yourself permission, say 'I am only interested in right now.' Have a look, see what's going on. The birds are singing, the cat is grooming its belly, the sky is blue, the body is breathing, the computer is humming, and there's a whole pile of moments cascading one into the next. Problems are somehow somewhere else.

Go the whole Buddhist hog. When you are sitting, just sit. When you are walking, just walk. When you are breathing, just breathe. Sounds easy? Erm, give it a go.